Post by chandy on Dec 25, 2007 15:46:48 GMT -5
Mom and Dad:
Please. Please forgive me, but I won't be home again. Maybe someday you'll look out and, barely consious, you'll say to no one, "Isn't something missing?" You wont cry for my absence, I know. You forgot me long ago Am I that unimportant? Am I so insignificant? Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me? Even though I'm the sacrifice, you won't try for me. Not now. Though I'd die to know you love me, I'm all alone. Isn't someone missing me? Please. Please forgive me. But I won't be home again.
I know what you'll do to yourself. You'll bury it deep and cry out, "Isn't something missing?"
Isn't someone missing me, even though I'm the sacrifice?
And if I bleed, I'll bleed knowing you don't care. And if I sleep just to dream of you, I'll wake without you there. Isn't something missing? Something?
Even though I'm the sacrifice, you won't try for me. Not now. Even though I'd die to know you loved me.
Now I'm all alone.
"Isn't something missing?"
Isn't someone missing me?
Bye.
- Sarah.
p.s. Morgan - this isn't your fault. I love you, too. I'm sorry.
I tucked my sister's note back in my tote bag and gazed out the window, down below. The airplane was coming close to landing - I could make out the airport in the distance, but barely. Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the headrest. My mouth was very dry, and with a short laugh I realized I hadn't had a drink of anything throughout the entire flight to California.
"We will be reaching our destination in ten minutes. Please return to your seats, buckle your seatbelts, and return your chairs to their upright positions. Make sure your trays are up and locked in place and that all electronic devices are turned off until we land. Thank you for flying with American Airlines."
Since I had to pee like no other, the second I escaped the crowded airplane, I dashed for the nearest restroom, which was luckily empty. After using the restroom, I walked over to the mirror, leaning over the sink to splash my face with the cold airport water. I brought my head up, dried it off on a paper towel, and stared at my reflection.
You could tell by just looking at me that my personality and humor was duller than before. My once tan skin now looked sallow and unhealthy, even though it was still clear of blemishes. My blue eyes were wider, darker, and unhappy. The frown on my face now felt permanently etched into my skin. I hadn't smiled in weeks.
I walked out of the bathroom and went to get my bags - I found them quickly, even though I wasn't very impatient. I had all the time in the world to wait.
"Morgan?" a meek voice said behind me as I pulled my luggage off the conveyor belt. It must have been Denise, the woman I was staying with. She was a friend of my mother's from high school, who apparently owed her a favor. I guess she saw the tag on my suitcase handle.
I turned around and was mildly surprised - she didn't have the tired look of my mom, even though they were almost exactly the same age. Denise was very pretty, with soft, dark curls that fell gracefully on her shoulders. Her smile was bright as she reached over to hug me tightly, like she knew me. I was shocked at how comfortable I felt in Denise's embrace - she was a stranger, after all.
"How was your flight?" Denise asked, taking one of my bags and leading me away from the conveyor belt. I shrugged silently, but she must have seen the gesture in her peripheral vision, because she continued. "I hate flying too much for someone who does it all the time." Denise smiled at me and then looked around. "Where'd they go, now?"
"Who?" I asked. She kept looking around while she answered.
"The rest of my family. I told them to wait here, but I don't see them." Denise pulled out her cell phone and quickly dialed a number, then pressed it against her ear. I waited patiently, looking around for a group of people I had never seen before.
"Where are you?" Denise asked into her phone. "We're by the gift shop... Where? I don't... Oh, I see you. Okay..." I followed Denise's gaze as she snapped the phone shut, and saw a young man standing by a rack of magazines inside the gift shop with a phone in his hand, staring at me. She had a son. Great.
"Mommy, can I get this bear?" another guy said as we entered the shop. I whipped around, surprised, to see another tall, tan boy - about twenty or so - holding a mug. She had more?
"Joe, aren't you a little old for stuffed animals?" Denise sighed, looking at the boy as he set the bear down. "Morgan, this is my son, Joseph." The boy flashed me a crooked grin and shook my hand. His grip was firm, his skin soft; my heart was thumping against my rib cage until he let go.
"Morgan, this is my husband, Kevin Sr." I shook his hand with a small, polite smile and turned to the tall guy standing next to him, the one Denise had talked to on the phone. "And our oldest, Kevin." I shook his hand with raised eyebrows.
"Two Kevin's? That's not going to be confusing at all," I said sarcastically. They all laughed.
"You can call me Paul, if it would help," Denise's husband offered. I nodded, letting my wide smile fade. I hadn't smiled for so long, that now... it kind of hurt.
"Where are Nick and Frankie?" Denise asked Paul. I furrowed my eyebrows incredulously and interrupted her.
"You have more?" I asked. I didn't see it that funny until Joe started laughing. I mock-scowled at him and he winked sexily at me.
"The two youngest - Nick is eighteen and Frankie's ten." Nick was my age, and if he was half as cute as his big brothers... that was going to be an issue.
"Frankie, put that back before you break it," someone said near the back of the store, loudly. We all followed the voice until we found two boys fighting over a Los Angeles snow globe.
"I'm not gonna break it," the younger boy mumbled, yanking it out of Nick's grip. Nick had his back to us while Frankie set the globe back down on the shelf.
"Oh, you two quit it," Denise said. Nick whirled around and my heart literally stopped for a second. It had never done that before. It freaking stopped.
The song Sexyback started playing in my mind as Nick sauntered over to us. This was definitely going to be a problem.
"Damn," I said under my breath. Apparently Kevin and Joe caught it, because they were gasping for breath, laughing hysterically. Nick stared curiously at them, and I really wanted to hit them. I looked back up at Nick, who was smirking at me. It was an exceptionally hot smirk.
Damn it.
Please. Please forgive me, but I won't be home again. Maybe someday you'll look out and, barely consious, you'll say to no one, "Isn't something missing?" You wont cry for my absence, I know. You forgot me long ago Am I that unimportant? Am I so insignificant? Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me? Even though I'm the sacrifice, you won't try for me. Not now. Though I'd die to know you love me, I'm all alone. Isn't someone missing me? Please. Please forgive me. But I won't be home again.
I know what you'll do to yourself. You'll bury it deep and cry out, "Isn't something missing?"
Isn't someone missing me, even though I'm the sacrifice?
And if I bleed, I'll bleed knowing you don't care. And if I sleep just to dream of you, I'll wake without you there. Isn't something missing? Something?
Even though I'm the sacrifice, you won't try for me. Not now. Even though I'd die to know you loved me.
Now I'm all alone.
"Isn't something missing?"
Isn't someone missing me?
Bye.
- Sarah.
p.s. Morgan - this isn't your fault. I love you, too. I'm sorry.
I tucked my sister's note back in my tote bag and gazed out the window, down below. The airplane was coming close to landing - I could make out the airport in the distance, but barely. Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the headrest. My mouth was very dry, and with a short laugh I realized I hadn't had a drink of anything throughout the entire flight to California.
"We will be reaching our destination in ten minutes. Please return to your seats, buckle your seatbelts, and return your chairs to their upright positions. Make sure your trays are up and locked in place and that all electronic devices are turned off until we land. Thank you for flying with American Airlines."
Since I had to pee like no other, the second I escaped the crowded airplane, I dashed for the nearest restroom, which was luckily empty. After using the restroom, I walked over to the mirror, leaning over the sink to splash my face with the cold airport water. I brought my head up, dried it off on a paper towel, and stared at my reflection.
You could tell by just looking at me that my personality and humor was duller than before. My once tan skin now looked sallow and unhealthy, even though it was still clear of blemishes. My blue eyes were wider, darker, and unhappy. The frown on my face now felt permanently etched into my skin. I hadn't smiled in weeks.
I walked out of the bathroom and went to get my bags - I found them quickly, even though I wasn't very impatient. I had all the time in the world to wait.
"Morgan?" a meek voice said behind me as I pulled my luggage off the conveyor belt. It must have been Denise, the woman I was staying with. She was a friend of my mother's from high school, who apparently owed her a favor. I guess she saw the tag on my suitcase handle.
I turned around and was mildly surprised - she didn't have the tired look of my mom, even though they were almost exactly the same age. Denise was very pretty, with soft, dark curls that fell gracefully on her shoulders. Her smile was bright as she reached over to hug me tightly, like she knew me. I was shocked at how comfortable I felt in Denise's embrace - she was a stranger, after all.
"How was your flight?" Denise asked, taking one of my bags and leading me away from the conveyor belt. I shrugged silently, but she must have seen the gesture in her peripheral vision, because she continued. "I hate flying too much for someone who does it all the time." Denise smiled at me and then looked around. "Where'd they go, now?"
"Who?" I asked. She kept looking around while she answered.
"The rest of my family. I told them to wait here, but I don't see them." Denise pulled out her cell phone and quickly dialed a number, then pressed it against her ear. I waited patiently, looking around for a group of people I had never seen before.
"Where are you?" Denise asked into her phone. "We're by the gift shop... Where? I don't... Oh, I see you. Okay..." I followed Denise's gaze as she snapped the phone shut, and saw a young man standing by a rack of magazines inside the gift shop with a phone in his hand, staring at me. She had a son. Great.
"Mommy, can I get this bear?" another guy said as we entered the shop. I whipped around, surprised, to see another tall, tan boy - about twenty or so - holding a mug. She had more?
"Joe, aren't you a little old for stuffed animals?" Denise sighed, looking at the boy as he set the bear down. "Morgan, this is my son, Joseph." The boy flashed me a crooked grin and shook my hand. His grip was firm, his skin soft; my heart was thumping against my rib cage until he let go.
"Morgan, this is my husband, Kevin Sr." I shook his hand with a small, polite smile and turned to the tall guy standing next to him, the one Denise had talked to on the phone. "And our oldest, Kevin." I shook his hand with raised eyebrows.
"Two Kevin's? That's not going to be confusing at all," I said sarcastically. They all laughed.
"You can call me Paul, if it would help," Denise's husband offered. I nodded, letting my wide smile fade. I hadn't smiled for so long, that now... it kind of hurt.
"Where are Nick and Frankie?" Denise asked Paul. I furrowed my eyebrows incredulously and interrupted her.
"You have more?" I asked. I didn't see it that funny until Joe started laughing. I mock-scowled at him and he winked sexily at me.
"The two youngest - Nick is eighteen and Frankie's ten." Nick was my age, and if he was half as cute as his big brothers... that was going to be an issue.
"Frankie, put that back before you break it," someone said near the back of the store, loudly. We all followed the voice until we found two boys fighting over a Los Angeles snow globe.
"I'm not gonna break it," the younger boy mumbled, yanking it out of Nick's grip. Nick had his back to us while Frankie set the globe back down on the shelf.
"Oh, you two quit it," Denise said. Nick whirled around and my heart literally stopped for a second. It had never done that before. It freaking stopped.
The song Sexyback started playing in my mind as Nick sauntered over to us. This was definitely going to be a problem.
"Damn," I said under my breath. Apparently Kevin and Joe caught it, because they were gasping for breath, laughing hysterically. Nick stared curiously at them, and I really wanted to hit them. I looked back up at Nick, who was smirking at me. It was an exceptionally hot smirk.
Damn it.
